This chapter is dedicated to Littlesaru, who got back to me with the correct reason for Radittsu's behaviour in less than an hour after I'd posted the last chapter!
Pain
"Ouch!"
Radittsu winced, and his bondmate paused for a moment.
"I am sorry... Do you want me to stop?"
"No... just keep going... oww..."
Zha'haabron tugged again. And again. And again. Finally Radittsu caught his wrist.
"OWW!... right, that's enough! It hurts too much."
The king sat back on his heels, frowning.
"If we did this more often it wouldn't be so painful."
"I know, I know." The weary Saiyan held out a hand. "I'll do it myself."
Zha'haabron handed him the broad-toothed comb he'd spent the last half an hour using in a - mostly vain - attempt to remove the sand from his bondmate's heavy mane: Radittsu grabbed a hank of thick black hair tightly, roughly tugging the implement through the tangles.
Desert combat was no fun...
Since Zha'haabron was reluctant to spare any of the Saiyans guarding his zn'hre for any extended period, Ye'vena and Radittsu between them had worked out a programme which allowed everyone an equal amount of training, but only four at a time. Four in addition to Radittsu himself, that is: the captain insisted on attending each session, partly to assess his warriors' progress and partly to try to tire himself out. He wasn't happy about his self-enforced absence from the king - even knowing that Gh'heegonan was *monitoring* the situation, and that Zha'haabron was more than capable of taking care of himself, he still worried when they were apart - but he found himself wanting his bondmate, regardless of the circumstances. It wasn't the usual arousal he felt even just watching Zha'haabron: he'd grown used to that in the time they'd been together and although it was as strong as ever, he could handle it. This was something much less controllable. And it wasn't a loving feeling. It was more like - wanting to have Zha'haabron submit to him. To force him. Sate his own lust. To take him, use his body, whether he wanted it or not, whether it hurt him or not...
It frightened the big Saiyan. He couldn't bring himself to admit his sudden compulsion to anyone, least of all his beloved. He felt guilty, ashamed and confused, and in typical Saiyan fashion used physical exertion - and pain - to distract himself from what was happening inside him. By the time he returned to their suite, usually in the early hours of the morning, he was too exhausted to do anything more than hold Zha'haabron cradled against his aching body and sleep, deeply and dreamlessly.
Not surprisingly the king was troubled - and anxious.
**You are pushing yourself too hard. It isn't necessary for you to attend every session**
Radittsu had run a hand over tired eyes and sighed.
*I know. But I want to.*
Zha'haabron had frowned, cupping his face in cool hands.
**What is wrong?**
*Nothing.*
The king hissed exasperatedly.
**Don't lie to me**
The Saiyan pulled away and flopped onto his back on the bed, his arm over his eyes.
*Please, beloved, I just... I'm so tired... Can't it wait?*
Zha'haabron sighed and acquiesced, and Radittsu closed his eyes. He knew his bondmate was annoyed that he was refusing to share whatever the problem was, but right now he just wanted the oblivion of sleep.
And the king let him get away with it - for the moment. But Zha'haabron was worried, and wouldn't put up with his procrastination for very much longer.
His scalp smarting, Radittsu finally gave up, dropping the comb, sighing and smiling tiredly at his bondmate.
"I really wish I could bathe."
Zha'haabron stroked his face, one eyebrow raised and enlightenment in his eyes.
"Ah. Does immersion help to keep your mane unsnarled?"
"More or less. More so than using that cleanser, anyway."
The king nodded. "That would make sense..."
He rose and loped to the comms unit, issuing what sounded like an order in R'ren'nkh'ia-go, then returned to the bed and held out a hand. Radittsu stared.
"What is it?"
Zha'haabron leaned to grip his wrist and pulled him easily upright.
Come with me."
A short while later, in a small chamber he'd never seen before, the Saiyan slid into a shallow pool of deliciously cool water, eyes closing ecstatically.
*... beloved... thank you...*
Zha'haabron sat on the side of the pool as Radittsu lay back in the water, strong blue hands gently teasing through the heavy black mane, easing out sand and tangles alike and kneading at his bondmate's neck and shoulders.
**Good?**
*...oh yes...* He opened one eye. *Will you join me?*
Zha'haabron smiled and shook his head.
**It's a little too cold for me. And the pool is really too small for two**
*... I love you...*
He caught his breath at the sudden *surge* of tenderness from his bondmate, and sighed as he reached up to stroke the delicate face.
*I'm sorry I've been so - distracted.*
Zha'haabron inclined his head.
**I assume you have good reason. I am always here, should you wish to share**
Radittsu pulled himself to his knees, facing his beloved, biting his lip.
*I don't deserve you.*
Zha'haabron chuckled, a hint of tears in his eyes.
**That is a matter of opinion. It is not my opinion. I think you have some idea of how important you are to me, by now. If you are troubled - please, let me help**
*I will...*
But right at that moment the big Saiyan was content, relaxed and happy. Being able to bathe probably had a lot to do with it. And the buoyant feeling of wellbeing carried on into the evening, as he made love to his bondmate with a gentleness and intensity that had the trembling R'ren'nkh'ian moaning blissfully in his arms.
Unfortunately, it was not to last.
"Uhhhh......"
He forced his eyes open, puzzled by the curious pulling sensation at the back of his head.
"What...?"
Zha'haabron kissed his neck.
"I am trying to make your life a little easier."
Radittsu reached a hand to his neck, recoiling in alarm when his fingers touched skin instead of his mane.
"What..? What have you done?!"
Zha'haabron flicked the long, thick and weighty black plait over his bondmate's shoulder.
"It will prevent tangling."
The Saiyan lifted it, dubiously. It wasn't the sleekest or tidiest plait he'd ever seen - given the varying lengths and coarse texture of his hair that would be impossible - and it felt uncomfortable, far heavier than when his mane was loose. But he had to admit he felt cooler without it cascading down his back, and Zha'haabron was right, it would tangle less. He could learn to live with it.
But Zha'haabron hadn't finished...
"What are you doing now?"
The king was deftly wrapping a long strip of sand coloured material around the plait, covering the hair underneath. As Zha'haabron finished securing the ends, Radittsu dragged the bound plait over his shoulder and stared at it, glancing up at his bondmate, who inclined his head, smiling faintly.
"It will keep the sand out. And make you less conspicuous in the desert."
"It looks ridiculous!"
"It looks practical."
Radittsu frowned - then gasped in surprise as Zha'haabron rolled him onto his back, brushing gentle kisses across his face then settling firm lips against his mouth. With a quiet groan the Saiyan wrapped his arms around the powerful cool body as his bondmate's tongue carefully sought entrance...
... then pulled back and shoved the king away, trembling, as that awful, destructive urge rose again, this time accompanied by images of Zha'haabron bound, suffering, his beautiful face contorted into a grimace of pain...
Zha'haabron was sprawled back on the bed, expression bewildered.
"Zk... zk'vissin...?"
Gritting his teeth, Radittsu threw himself from the bed and ran from the room, leaving his bondmate staring after him.
**Rhoi'i'dat'hzziu? Speak to me...?**
*Later. Please.*
**Am I interrupting?**
Zha'haabron had allowed his bondmate time to calm down before making *contact*: the Saiyan and R'ren'nkh'ian warriors were en route for that little area of mid-desert hell Ye'vena called the 'dustbowl' - prime terrain for a really tough training session. Radittsu could easily have *talked* for a while as they flew - but the sound of his bondmate's *voice* summoned up those images again...
*I need to concentrate.*
**Later, then. I hope the session goes well**
But he knew his beloved was hurt and confused, and it took all of his determination not to turn around and fly back to the enclave.
For hours they trained under the burning sun, pushing themselves to their limits, their shr'en'an opponents using every move conceivable to defeat them. They stopped only to drink, gasping, when dehydration threatened to curtail the session.
And then they started again...
Meanwhile, back at the enclave, Zha'haabron had forced his dismay and concern to the back of his mind for the time being, and readied himself for another meeting of his council.
Ti'lais and Ti'strees, with Dhr'is and three other shr'en'an as guard, were now ten days travel from Gh'grigon's enclave, and had been forced to cease any kind of electronic contact with the council: they were already aware of the va'ha'da's own guard shadowing them and didn't dare risk any kind of disclosure. Zha'haabron was hoping that the infiltrators would be able to communicate with the captive zn'hre so that he could *speak* to them himself, but in the event that that proved impossible, the small party was effectively on its own. Ti'lais had been adamant that she didn't care.
"For even a chance to destroy that h'k'vierch I would risk far more."
Ti'strees hadn't felt quite as strongly - but the knowledge that she might be able to help the suffering zn'hre was enough to convince her to suppress her own qualms.
"We will do all that we can, my Ssii'iin."
Zha'haabron had embraced them both.
"Brave and loyal. I honour you."
Stammering with pleased embarrassment, the two broods had blushed and bowed their heads, and left the following day in a small, well-used, but powerful and sturdy little vessel. Following them, three days later, was a somewhat larger craft containing a force of thirty warriors, mostly shr'en'an, who would pause at the edge of Gh'grigon's territory, ready in case they were needed. It had meant depleting the enclave's own forces, but with the first shock of the rogue va'ha'da's escape now over, Zha'haabron had reassessed the enclave's strengths and felt sure they could cope.
There was nothing the council could do now except wait.
Half way through the meeting there had been a communication from Vejiita, announcing the successful annexation of Kinzoku (and the almost incidental destruction of its Inu-jin warrior force). The Saiya-jin chemists, working closely with Zha'haabron's own pharmaceutical experts, had now perfected the narcotics that might be needed for the next phase of the Saiya-jin Empire's expansion, and would shortly be shipping them back to Vejiitasei. And on a personal note, Leteetza's pregnancy was progressing well, and although he was still very unhappy about it, he had at least now accepted it as an accomplished fact. And Buahan had said her first words. At least, Ti'aasaan had said they were words - in R'ren'nkh'ia-go, which had annoyed the king greatly, until the little zn'hre had pointed out that the language was extremely difficult for non-R'ren'nkh'ia-jin to master, and this should be seen as a sign of much promise and potential. The Saiya-jin-no-Ou was arranging for his heirs to be tested to see if their intelligence could be gauged at such a young age.
And Vinas wanted to speak to the High King and his bondmate. Could they contact him later?
Biting back a sudden surge of excitement, Zha'haabron replied that they could. The king nodded and signed off. Gh'heegonan smiled.
"Somewhat brusque, our ally."
Zha'haabron inclined his head.
"Indeed. But easy enough to cope with, if handled properly. Remember to never tell him more than half of what you have planned, and ensure our stocks of Saiya-jin narcotics are never depleted."
"You think he might turn on us?"
Zha'haabron shook his head.
"I think not. But it is impossible to be certain." He sighed, then smiled. "With the Saiyan heirs growing up with my own offspring, and Ti'aasaan and Zha'haarak already influencing their development, I believe that the next Saiya-jin-no-Ou will be altogether a more civilised and trustworthy ruler. But that is a long way ahead. In the meantime, I would prefer for us to be prepared. At all times. Just in case."
The council members all nodded their agreement, and Gh'heegonan bowed his head.
"Very wise, my Ssii'iin. Now, if we might turn to other matters?..."
Radittsu arrived back after sunset and limped to his quarters, almost dropping with fatigue. Zha'haabron's eyes widened at the massive bruising over almost all of his body, the dried blood coating his hands and arms - and the reddened, almost sunburned skin of his face and shoulders. The king rose decisively and hissed an order into the comm unit - then gathered the Saiyan easily into his arms and carried him, too tired to protest, to the small bathing chamber, stripped him, unbound and unplaited his mane, and lowered him into the water.
Radittsu struggled weakly.
*Beloved, it's too cold for you...*
Zha'haabron glared him to silence and began to gently lave his painful, aching body as the Saiyan fought to keep his eyes open. But after half an hour or so his bondmate's movements slowed and became a little less smooth and graceful, and Radittsu knew, exhausted as he was, that the coldness of the water was beginning to affect his bondmate. He struggled upright and laid his hands on Zha'haabron's shoulders.
*That's enough, beloved. Please, let's get back to the suite.*
The king pulled the Saiyan back into his arms and rose from the pool, moving carefully as the cold ate into him. He'd intended carrying his bondmate back, but Radittsu insisted on being lowered to his feet. He wrapped an arm and his tail around Zha'haabron's waist.
*You've done enough. I can walk.*
The fact that the king gave in without demur proved how chilled he really was, and Radittsu cursed himself for being selfish. He pulled his bondmate into his arms, trying to share some heat with the cold, faintly shivering body.
*I can carry you if it hurts to walk.*
Zha'haabron regarded him for a moment, then smiled.
**It would be better for you not to have the extra exertion. But the sooner we return to our rooms the better, I think. And we have yet to contact Vinas**
Radittsu stared at him for a moment, eyes wide and lips parted, then - exhaustion temporarily forgotten - swept the king into his arms and flew them to the suite.
Zh'leet looked insufferably pleased with herself.
"We've done it. We know how to make it possible for you two to breed."
Vinas frowned.
"Although you must understand there are still dangers attached to the procedure."
Radittsu glanced at his bondmate's pale, anxious face.
"What sort of dangers?"
"We cannot yet control the type of pregnancy with absolute accuracy. Obviously, to avoid stress on the High King's body we'd prefer it to be a R'ren'nkh'ian hosting, but there is a slim chance the foetus would develop as a Saiyan - which would mean a placental attachment to the hosting chamber. R'ren'nkh'ia-jin are not naturally equipped to cope with such a thing."
"What would happen?"
Uncharacteristically, Vinas hesitated, seemingly unwilling to go into the details. "We would need to monitor the pregnancy very closely indeed. Medical intervention of one sort or another would be necessary, of course, but we'd prefer to keep it to a minimum."
Zha'haabron stirred. "Please just explain the procedure..."
Vinas nodded. "Very well. The actual conception will take place in the laboratory: we can devise no way for you to conceive naturally, since this necessitates some delicate genetic manipulation. A healthy embyo would then be implanted into your body, and if all goes well you'd have an almost normal hosting, with a natural birth at the end."
The king nodded. "I see. And if things go wrong?"
"We can always terminate as a last resort."
"But we'd do everything possible to avoid such a thing." Zh'leet added hastily.
"How long would the hosting last?"
"We've had to use a computer simulation and projection for much of this, so the figures aren't absolutely reliable, but we'd say around three hundred days."
"And we'd need to monitor you constantly. You would have to remain here." Vinas added.
Radittsu *felt* his bondmate's despondency. Three hundred days. With things as they were right now, there was no way they could even think of having the High King out of commission for thirty days, let alone three hundred. Their dream would have to wait.
The Saiyan wrapped his arms around his beloved's shoulders from behind and kissed the side of his neck.
*I'm sorry...*
**It is hardly your fault**
*I know. But...*
Zha'haabron sighed. **At least we now know it is possible**
He gazed at the two faces on the screen.
"Thank you for all of your hard work. We won't be able to take advantage of it at the moment..." he smiled as Radittsu's arms tightened around him "... but as soon as it is possible, we will call on your invaluable expertise."
Zh'leet nodded, her eyes twinkling. "My Ssii'iin, I can't wait!"
Zha'haabron closed his eyes briefly. And I wish with all my heart we didn't have to..."When the time comes, little broodling, you have my permission to coddle and cosset me to your heart's content."
"I shall hold you to that, my Ssii'iin."
"I would expect nothing less."
Vinas had folded his arms, a half-satisfied, half-frustrated expression on his grim grey face. "Whenever you're ready, your Majesty. There's no time limit. In the meantime we'll carry on trying to perfect the process, and let you know if we come up with any further refinements."
"My thanks, Vinas."
The biogeneticist inclined his head and cut the connection. Zha'haabron's shoulders slumped as Radittsu held him tightly.
**So long. So very long. And I don't know how long it will take to resolve our problems here...**
The Saiyan rocked him gently.
*Beloved, it doesn't matter. The fact is it's possible. When we're ready, when we have the time, it can be done.* He paused for a moment, sudden realisation and a bubbling happiness filling him as he leaned over one broad shoulder and pulled Zha'haabron's face to his, his eyes alight with joy. *Beloved, this means we can have children. Our own children.*
Zha'haabron stared at him for a moment, then smiled tearfully.
**Yes, it does, doesn't it?**
He twisted to hug his bondmate, hard: Radittsu yelped, and he let go quickly, alarmed.
**I'm sorry...**
*It's all right. My skin's sore, that's all.*
Zha'haabron bit his lip as he examined the hot redness on the Saiyan's face and shoulders more closely, then pulled him upright.
**We have a lotion that will soothe the burns. How did they happen, anyway? You were wearing the sunscreen**
Radittsu shrugged, then winced.
*Just one of those things I suppose. Let's be quick, though - I want to call the family...*
Ti'aasaan and Zha'haarak looked, thought Radittsu, simply wonderful. Even through the comm link he could feel their simmering joy. The pregnancies didn't show yet, and wouldn't for a while, but they were both almost glowing with health and happiness. He wondered if Zha'haabron would look that beautiful, then smiled to himself, looking forward to finding out...
By contrast Leteetza looked pale and exhausted. But both zn'hre were extremely solicitous, quite obviously cradling her in affection and tenderness, and the bondmates were satisfied everything possible was being done to make the burden as light as possible for the little Saiyan...
Radittsu bit his lip. He wanted to be there, wanted them both to be there, to share in the family's life.
"It's so good to see you all! And how are the little horrors doing?"
Leteetza grinned at that, and held Zha'raadiin up to the screen. The infant scowled furiously at his sire and the Saiyan, then struggled out of the King's Companion's arms and flew gracefully over to the sleeping platform. Leteetza shrugged.
"They're all doing really well." She moved back slightly so that the distant pair could see the other babies, in the zn'hre's arms, clamouring for a sight of their missing family. Radittsu grinned as little Zha'haabron gazed dolefully at him, then rested a tiny palm against the screen. The big Saiyan placed his own over the image.
"Are you being good?"
Little Zha'haabron nodded gravely, then inclined his head.
"When coming home, dadda?"
Radittsu blinked and stared at Leteetza - who looked equally startled. She grinned at the bondmates.
"Don't look at me, I didn't teach him that!"
The infant zn'hre shifted his attention to Zha'haabron and laid the other palm against the screen: the king instinctively covered it with his own.
"Miss you, papa."
Radittsu glanced at the thoroughly surprised and delighted Zha'haabron. *I wonder what he calls Ti'aasaan!*
The king *chuckled*, then smiled gently.
"I miss you too, little one. We'll try and come home soon. In the meantime, be good, won't you."
The little head nodded. "I be good. I be a prince - I must be good!"
Laughing, Leteetza lifted him from the console, hugging him briefly before handing him back to Ti'aasaan.
"I'll try and work on his grammar before you come home!" Her smile muted somewhat. "Any idea when that'll be?"
Radittsu shook his head.
"I'm sorry little warrior. We have a few unexpected problems to sort out here first."
Zha'haabron had tensed, but been unable to stop the Saiyan from speaking, and now the two adult zn'hre stared at the screen, their expressions taut.
"What has happened, my love?"
Zha'haabron sighed, then mentally shrugged and told them of the two va'ha'da's escape...
At the end of the truncated account Zha'haarak was pale and trembling, while Ti'aasaan's eyes were huge with anger. The little zn'hre hugged his taller partner close, stroking his back, trying to *give* reassurance.
"My Ssii'iin - you will be very careful, won't you? I don't know what we'd do if you... if... You have to come back to us."
"I have every intention of so doing." He gazed at his host-sib, eyes haunted. "Brother, I am sorry. If I had killed him to start with this would never have happened."
"It isn't your fault, heart-brother. But please, if you can, kill him when you find him. Don't let anyone else suffer."
Zha'haabron smiled, grimly, and touched the screen. Zha'haarak laid his own hand against the image of the blue palm.
"I promise. I won't let them escape again..."
*... will it be all right?...*
Radittsu was on the very edge of unconsciousness, Zha'haabron curled against his back. The brief wakefulness engendered by the bath and Vinas and Zh'leet's news had faded, and all he wanted was to sleep. Zha'haabron sighed and kissed between his shoulder blades.
**We will make it be so. We haven't come this far, with this much pain and effort, to have everything fail now**
*... oh... good...*
He knew nothing more until midnight, when he was torn awake, biting his lip until it bled to stop himself screaming aloud. The nightmare clear in his mind. Zha'haabron broken, bleeding, dying...
And himself responsible.
© 2001 November 11th Joules Taylor
