Aftermath 3

"Ti'a-chan?" 'jiisa laid a hand on the little zn'hre's shoulder, worried at the lack of response. Bri'sassa knelt in front of Ti'aasaan, smiling hesitantly.
      "Ssii'iir? Will you eat something?"
      The little zn'hre listlessly took a piece of fruit, took a small bite, then let his hand drop to the side. His eyes were lowered, gazing at Zo'rien nestled in his lap: the tiny hostling's gold-flecked black eyes stared back unblinkingly. 'jiisa glanced at his h'hzien and shook his head slightly.
      They sat in Ti'zheenan's 'garden', the pool unlidded, a tiny fountain bubbling quietly to one side. Ti'zheenan, one hostling in his lap, the other three playing quietly amongst the plants, eyed the two young warriors and inclined his head.
      "Perhaps Ti'a-chan needs a little time to himself."
      'jiisa raised an eyebrow - then smiled worriedly and gestured to his h'hzien.
      "We should get back, anyway. Can we visit later?"
      Ti'zheenan nodded.
      "'saayen and Suguri will be back this evening. Please, join us for our meal."
      "Thank you..." 'jiisa glanced anxiously at the little zn'hre: Ti'zheenan smiled.
      "I will tend to the Ssii'iir."
      "You'll call us if you need anything?"
      The delicate zn'hre nodded.
      "Of course."
      He and Ti'aasaan sat in silence for a while after the warriors had left. The family had arrived twenty days ago, amidst much rejoicing: everyone was pleased to see the High King again, not least his sireling. And Gh'heegonan had happily reported that all was going well; 'haabron had taken to his gradually-increasing duties as though born to them - which, in a way, he had been. 'leesaan had been welcomed into 'jiisa and 'sassa's little fellowship and was slowly regaining a measure of his previous equanimity: the rest of the family were housed in the royal quarters - with the exception of Ti'aasaan. Ti'zheenan had asked the king if he'd mind if the little zn'hre stayed with them, and Zha'haabron had agreed to it. So far, however, the delicate zn'hre had had no luck in reaching his kin.
      He sighed, watching the bowed head. He had to get through that... barrier, somehow, this wasn't good for anyone, especially not Zo'rien. The hostling wasn't speaking - or *speaking* - to anyone except his host. And no-one could be certain he was even doing that much: Ti'aasaan simply didn't communicate any more.
      Ti'zheenan frowned to himself. Time to change that, before both the little zn'hre and his hostling suffered any real harm. He moved a little closer, pushing his hostling Fa'seenan towards Zo'rien then taking Ti'aasaan's limp hand firmly in his own. The little zn'hre looked up into his companion's face, his own distressingly blank.
      **You must come back to us, zk'viss**
      Ti'aasaan lowered his head, but didn't move his hand. Ti'zheenan stroked his fingers gently.
      **We miss you, zk'viss. And Zo'rien needs you - the real you, not the shadow you have become. You are hurting him**
      Ti'aasaan's head slowly came up, eyes wide and pained. Ti'zheenan nodded.
      **He is not growing properly. He'd not communicating. Not... thriving...**
      **He is well**
      The little zn'hre's first words in fifty days. Encouraged, Ti'zheenan lifted the tiny hostling from his companion's lap, holding him gently in the crook of his arm. Zo'rien's eyes never left his host, and one small hand clutched at pale green plaits, keeping tight hold. Ti'zheenan sighed.
      **You see? He should be talking by now, with us, with the other hostlings. Part of the family** He squeezed Ti'aasaan's hand gently. **I know a little of how you feel, zk'viss. It hurts, it hurts unbearably. But you cannot be selfish. He wouldn't want that, would he. Wouldn't want your grief to hurt his sireling**
      Tears gathered in the little zn'hre's eyes as he shook his head. Ti'zheenan kissed his hair.
      **No one would expect you to be happy, little one. But we want to help. Want to help ease the pain, even if only a little. Let us in. Let us help. For Zo'rien. For Zorun's memory**
      Ti'aasaan gazed at his hostling, lying curled in Ti'zheenan's slender arm, then up into the delicate zn'hre's lovely face, into earnest, compassionate eyes. Ti'zheenan was right, of course. Nothing could ever fill the emptiness inside, but... Zorun would have loved his last child...
      Ti'zheenan pulled the little zn'hre to his side, holding him as he sobbed silently. They had a long way to go - but it was a start. The first real emotion Ti'aasaan had shown since the war.

"I'm taking you away from all this."
      Zha'haabron gazed at the pacing Saiyan, one eyebrow raised.
      "Indeed."
      Radittsu halted and turned to face him.
      "Yes. You're... overtired, overstressed, and need a complete break."
      The zn'hre blinked, then frowned.
      "Zk'aida..."
      Radittsu glowered, then moved to kneel at his bondmate's feet, taking the cool strong hands into his own and gazing up into weary golden eyes.
      *Please don't argue, beloved. Is it so wrong to want to have you to myself - just to myself - for a little while?*
      Zha'haabron gazed into the Saiyan's anxious face and felt himself melting. He closed his eyes, lowering his head.
      **... we have so much to do here...** But it was a token protest, and Radittsu moved a little closer, stretching up to kiss the cool silky lips.
      *Then we can combine it with a trip to Ish'nadris' enclave.*
      Zha'haabron blinked.
      **Ish'nadris?**
      The Saiyan smiled.
      *Kobis tells me that Ish'nadris would like us to visit - and has a favour to ask. No...* Radittsu laid a hand against the king's cheek, *don't try to *speak* to him, there's no need. It's a personal favour, I think.*
      Zha'haabron sighed.
      **It's a long way**
      *And I flew it, once before. We should do the same. Take enough water to keep us going and just... take off. R'ren'nkh'ia is safe - and it has been far too long since you and I flew together...*
      That was painfully true, thought Zha'haabron. And Radittsu was now protected from the sun - Vinas had seen to that before they left - and 'haabron and Kobis and Gh'heegonan really didn't need them here... He leaned forwards, kissing his bondmate's forehead.
      **There are few things that would give me more pleasure...**
      Radittsu grinned, his eyes sparkling.
      *I'll get everything arranged...*

"They're really coming here?"
      Ti'strees hugged the excited young zn'hre gently, affectionately.
      "Yes, zk'viss, they're really coming here."
      Ish'nandra wriggled, then sighed.
      "I can't wait..."

Below them the desert rolled to the horizon, infinite shades of sand and ochre and gold, a fine mid-day heat haze of shimmering motion, subtle and very beautiful. Zha'haabron's eyes closed as he soared, Radittsu shadowing him to his right.
      *You've never done this, have you?*
      **No. I have never had the freedom**
      The Saiyan *chuckled* and brushed his tail down the back of a long blue leg.
      *Good, isn't it?*
      His bondmate had a certain gift for understatement, Zha'haabron thought. Good hardly expressed the extraordinary sense of release this journey engendered...
      Radittsu tugged very gently on his plait, gesturing downwards to a shallow bowl of rock a darker brown against the surrounding sand.
      *We could rest there for an hour or so...*
      It was time: they'd been in the air since well before sunrise, Radittsu was thirsty, and despite the euphoria of the flight both were tired. Zha'haabron nodded.
      As temporary resting places went it was fairly comfortable. The Saiyan pulled his zk'aida to him, relishing the coolness of the strong blue body, and nuzzled his neck.
      *... beloved...*
      The zn'hre nestled back against the big body with a silent sigh, and for long moments neither spoke. Then the Saiyan stirred a little uneasily.
      *Will you tell me what's wrong?*
      There was absolutely no point in prevaricating: lies, even half-truths, simply weren't possible between them anymore. The king twisted to gaze into worried night-dark eyes.
      **... I am tired, zk'aida. All our dreams, all our hopes, our wishes about our beginnings - all came to nothing... when I first planned to... take over from Zha'geekan, free the zn'hre, I did not expect things to become so... complicated...** He slumped, rubbing at his forehead. **I was never ready for this...**
      Radittsu cradled him closely.
      *Don't think anyone ever is, zk'viss. You've had it harder than most, though. Saviour of your people, Alliance partner, Vejiita's... 'balance'...* He sighed, kissing the silky green hair. *Sometimes you just need to be you, without the luggage. You don't get the chance very often.*
      Zha'haabron nodded, and Radittsu kissed his claim mark.
      *Could you hand over to 'haabron? Resign? Just act as advisor rather than High King?*
      The zn'hre considered the idea for a moment, then shook his head.
      **Not yet. Not quite yet. But soon, I think**
      *You know I'll support you, whatever you decide to do?*
      Zha'haabron twisted to straddle his bondmate's lap.
      **Yes, I do know that. I love you for it**
      *For that?*
      **For... everything. For your love. Your understanding. Your tolerance. For being you** He stroked the Saiyan's cheek, trying to smile and failing. **For allowing me to be myself**
      Radittsu scowled, then kissed him gently.
      *I would never, ever, want you to be anything else.*
      Zha'haabron tucked his head under his bondmate's chin, weeping silently, thankfully, as Radittsu *enveloped* him, in warmth, and understanding, and love.

"It's good to see you again, Ssii'iir Ish'nadris."
      The zn'hre was still thin, Radittsu saw as he saluted Saiyan-fashion, fist over his heart. But beautiful. His years as chief of the sshli'thsen had been happy ones, once the initial objections had been overcome, and his people obviously loved him. Ish'ayi was, as ever, at his side, protective and watchful.
      Ish'nadris smiled, then bowed deeply to the High King.
      "Greetings, my Ssii'iin. You honour us with your presence."
      Zha'haabron inclined his head as the chief ushered them into a spacious, cool reception chamber where refreshments were waiting. On their arrival they'd been escorted to their own suite, invited to soak for a while in the warmed water provided, given fresh clothing and left in peace to recover from the journey for a couple of hours before a shy, graceful young zn'hre, bearing more than a passing resemblance to Ish'nadris, arrived to conduct them to the chief. Ish'nadris gestured to the guide.
      "This is my hostling, Ish'nandra."
      The young zn'hre was beautiful, his skin a slightly darker blue than the king, and his hair the colour of new leaves after Vejiitasei's cold season. Gleaming, soft warm golden eyes regarded the royal pair diffidently from below a long, shaggy fringe. Zha'haabron smiled, encouragingly.
      "Hello young one."
      Ish'nandra blushed and lowered his eyes.
      "H... hello Your Majesty..."
      Zha'haabron rested cool fingertips under his chin and gently pulled his face back up.
      "You do not need to be nervous, zvi'ch. We are pleased to meet you."
      The hostling offered a tiny shy smile, too overcome to speak. Zha'haabron glanced at Ish'nadris, who tilted his head.
      "Ish'nandra has expressed the wish to visit the royal enclave, possibly stay there, if that is acceptable."
      "Of course - you will be most welcome." The king took the hostling's hand. "Will you return with us?"
      "If... if I may, Your Majesty..."
      Radittsu chuckled, making the nervous young zn'hre start.
      "I'm sure we can manage."
      Ish'nadris nodded.
      "I will have Ish'ayi make preparation. How long may you stay?"
      "Ten days, no longer." Zha'haabron smiled at his bondmate, who frowned, ready to object. **It is long enough, zkai'da**
      Radittsu doubted that, but reluctantly held his peace, and the king turned to Ish'nadris.
      "Tomorrow we must speak of the state of things - but tonight I would prefer to relax."
      "Of course, my Ssii'iin." Ish'nadris gestured to a handful of servitors waiting attentively at the main entrance: they disappeared as members of the sshli'thsen filed leisurely in, seating themselves on the floor cushions. "We have prepared a feast, and later there will be music, if it pleases you."
      Zha'haabron nodded.
      "Very much. You have our thanks for your hospitality."
      "It is our pleasure, Ssii'iin." Ish'nadris bowed his head as the servitors returned laden down with trays and platters piled high with the unique culinary creations of the Southern Desert...

It had been a wonderful excursion. They'd spent two days in conference with Ish'nadris' court, taken two days to fly down to the Southern Mountains - Radittsu hadn't been too keen on the idea to start with, but Zha'haabron had insisted, and in fact it seemed to help the Ssii'iin to finally come to terms with the disaster that had been their attempt to discover their origins - and the rest of the time the Saiyan had determinedly pampered his bondmate, helped by two adoring broods. By the time they were ready to return, Zha'haabron was rested, calmed and much less tense than he had been.
      Ish'nadris was sorry to see them leave. Ish'ayi had outfitted a small fast transport vessel for Ish'nandra, Ti'strees, a couple of gn'ick'lehe and the royal pair, and a guard of four shr'en'an outriders: the trip should only take three days, four at most. The chief had held his hostling closely at their departure, wishing him joy. Ish'nandra had hugged him fondly.
      "Thank you, maazi... and may I be impudent?"
      Ish'nadris blinked, then smiled. For all his gentle, submissive nature, Ish'nandra could sometimes come out with surprisingly bold or outrageous suggestions...
      "Of course, zk'vissin."
      "You should host again. And while you're hosting, you should take Ish'ayi. He worships you."
      Ish'nadris frowned. After the zn'hre's experiences at the hands of Gh'grigon he'd only ever allowed fellow-zn'hre into his body... But Ish'ayi was completely devoted, and the chief had been aware of his - unrequited - adoration for some time.
      "I think that would be most unfair to Ish'ayi."
      Ish'nandra considered it, frowning, then sighed and kissed his host's cheek.
      "He might not see it that way. Will you speak to him, maazi?"
      "I will consider it."
      "Thank you..."

It came as no great surprise to find that Ish'nandra quickly became a favourite in the family: the hostling was thoroughly sweet-natured and affectionate. 'haabron and Kobis in particular found themselves warming to him, and Zha'haabron smiled to himself. The young ones hadn't thought about the matter yet, but at some point it would be necessary to ensure the succession, and much as his people respected and admired the Saiya-jin, he was aware that they wouldn't accept a hybrid as king...

Fifty days after they'd arrived Vejiita communicated with the High King, asking when they were returning. Zha'haabron had asked why: Vejiita glowered over the comms unit.
      "We're planning the campaign against the Karilun. I want you and Radittsu here."
      Zha'haabron didn't argue. It would be a massive undertaking, and the Saiya-jin-no-Ou wanted to move as soon as possible - which, given the problems involved, would most likely be next High Summer. The zn'hre nodded agreement.
      "Very well. We will return as soon as is feasible. Within three days."
      Vejiita had growled, but made no further objection, and the High King had *called* the family together as the screen blanked.
      The trip had been good for all of them, he thought as they assembled in the royal suite. Ti'aasaan was, if not exactly happy, at least less withdrawn, communicating again, and Zo'rien was beginning to interact with others. Somewhat to his surprise, Le'leen and Ta'haarel requested permission to remain on R'ren'nkh'ia with the hostlings, make it their permanent home: Leteetza hadn't been at all happy with the news. Neither had Vejiita - but Zha'haabron insisted, and Le'leen became 'haabron's personal guard, much to everyone's satisfaction.
      And then they were on their way back, relaxed and rested, but all aware of the trials to come in the near future.